![[S]oft thumbnail](https://f4.bcbits.com/img/0009599769_42.jpg)
1. |
The words (said)
03:04
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Waking from a long dream
I'm not living. I'm not living
The ooos of the choirs
Tell me I need to get up
Say the words it will calm you down
Say the words it will calm you down
Say the words it will calm you down
Say the words it will calm you down
Voices echoing in a blank room
I'm trying to stay quiet
While they tell me what to do
I shake my head, I shake my head
I make it bounce on the wall
To not focus on my soul
And I hear them screaming the countdown
I'm telling myself it's gonna be fine
It's gonna be fine, it's gonna be fine
Say the words it will calm you down
Say the words it will calm you down
Say the words it will calm you down
Say the words it will calm you down
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2. |
Ticking time
04:56
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The little pictures of your face
The chimney of my house
The broken chair we kept
All the papers, all the debts
The clock hanging on the wall
The staircase from which you fell
And yes we laughed
At the top of our lungs
The mugs, the glasses
The bottles of alcohol
We couldn't even tell
But we drank anyway
The door that squeeked
Each time we opened it
I told you I would fix it
I did it when you left
The photographs of your prom
All the roses I gave to you
They are still there in a bottle
Of dirt and water
And time gets me
It took you
I don't know what to do
Without you
And time gets me
It took you
I don't know what to do
Without you
Time gets me
Time gets me
Now I'm left here in this broken life
I know I was supposed to grow up
But how am I supposed to see in the night
You made me blind
How am I supposed to live without her
How am I supposed to live without them
How am I supposed all alone
Why am I so alone
And time gets me
It took you
I don't know what to do
Without you
And time gets me
It took you
I don't know what to do
Without you
I'd probably be nothing
I'd probably be nothing
at all
at all
at all
at all
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3. |
The great blow
04:05
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Ignition, firecrackers
Something's building up
Set fire to the others
And watch it all burn
Move your head, go forward
Forget what's happening
Say the words, say the words
And keep on running
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Get out of your comfort zone
Smash your fucking phone
I just wanna hold your hand
I just wanna hold your hand
I feel so fucking worthless
I'm tired of the loneliness
Please remember me
I told you I was sorry
I know this song is messy
But I don't care about meanings
Because you know that the way you speak
Speaks more than the words you spit
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
Bloooow it uuuuup
And bring back the colours
[ambient]
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4. |
Your kindness
04:38
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I'm alone now
I'm alone now
I'm alone now
It's kind of cold in my room
The radiator is broken
And the sounds echo
A white noise in the lake
A soundproof wall
Catched all a telephone call
That's a hard thing to swallow
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know
You used to look at me
You used to talk to me
Please come back
I'm feeling so trapped
You know, you know
Writing meaningless shit
Trying to get out of it
Trying to get out of your anger
your anger, your anger
You used to be so kind
You used to be so kind
You used to be so kind
You used to be so kind (x a lot)
(you fucking changed)
You'll be forgotten
You'll be forgotten
You'll be forgotten
You'll be forgotten
You used to be so kind
You used to be so kind
But you fucking changed
But you fucking changed
You changed
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5. |
Flowers
05:00
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You were so pretty
You made those flowers bloom
Now I'm feeling like shit
I'm alone in my bedroom
On my death bed
I hope you'll be there
I'll hand you these flowers
And in every petal
You'll see my face
And all my regrets
I'll give you these
With all my love
And then you'll run away
And when the devil will grab me
He'll drag me to hell
And you'll forget
I'd sell my soul
To have a mutual gaze
I can exist in your head
Every conversation
We ever had
Could be written on their stems
So I'll give you my flowers
The ones I've been watering
For years and years and years
And one day you'll see
My broken heart
And that's all I want
That's all I want
That's all I want
You were so pretty
You made those flowers bloom
Now I'm feeling like shit
I'm alone in my bedroom
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6. |
Dreams of the tired
04:44
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Birds outside
Looking down
ooooo
The window
Pencil drafts
The good side
ooooo
The window
(Well now I've been rejected. It's okay I know you don't love me... But what am I supposed to do ? How am I supposed to face you every morning while I'm still trying to mourn, to grieve ? A classmate died... It's been months, but I can't hide. What can I do now ?)
Now it's time
Time's going fast
ooooo
Yeah I know
You just have
To go back
ooooo
Yeah I know
A bird announced peace
A white bird announced peace
Yes he has turned black
Yes he has turned black
(Well now I've been rejected. It's okay I know you don't love me... But what am I supposed to do ? How am I supposed to face you every morning while I'm still trying to mourn, to grieve ? A classmate died... It's been months, but I can't hide. What can I do now ?)
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7. |
Addicted (ghost)
06:55
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Another day
Another day
I'm fucking pulling the needle in
Again, again I'm not livin'
I see them moving their bodies
I think I'm addicted
To the constant screams
To the constant tapes
Rewinding the tapes
Going nowhere
Going nowhere
Going nowhere
And at last the chorus repeats
And at the end of the day
Everything's gonna be okay
As long as we obey obey
I'm addicted to your ghost
I lost my keys
In the garbage
I'm addicted to your ghost
Move your body all around
I can't even think without it
I think I'm addicted
When I take the pills like candies
I think I'm addicted
When I choke on them
I think I'm addicted
When I take too much just to handle the pain
I think I'm addicted
I'm stuck in a body
I think I'm addicted
A body destroying me
I think I'm addicted
Why did you say you were okay in the first place ?
I think I'm addicted
I'm addicted to your guts, to your face
I think I'm addicted
Moving our bodies to easy basic grunge
They are all dancing and I'm there alone
Strobe flashing lights, drunk and high friends
I say I'm alright but I'm close to my end
Nothing on my mind sitting on a chair
Faking a smile pretending that I care
Oh if only they knew
Oh if only they knew
If the floor feels so tough
If the liquids feel so rough
Ballooning to the roof
They'll never know
Yeah, they'll never know
Yeah, they'll never know
Staaaaaaaay inside
Move your body all around
Staaaaaaaay inside
You'll come out alive
Staaaaaaaay inside
Move your body all around
Staaaaaaaay inside
You'll come out alive
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8. |
U blammme
03:42
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You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
Lonely hearts are dangerous
It was hard for the both of us
When you blame my loneliness
On me and only me
It leaves me sad
It leaves me sad
'Cause
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
What have you done to change
You tell that to me everyday
I don't even want to fight
'Cause I know you're right
Okay, please tell me you're
Okay, please tell me you're
Okay, please tell me you're
Okay, please tell me you're
Safe, cause I'm lost
Then
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
You blame it all on me
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9. |
The daily walk
05:03
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In ten minutes I'll have to take my daily walk
Still under the sheets, it's still freezing cold
And I reluctantly take a shower my head hung low
Because under the water I feel at home
The water's covering my body with little tears
From the head to the penis, I feel like a locked up pig
A brief look at the mirror makes me sad
I used to be so content with what I had
I know I shouldn't look at my phone
Especially when I'm alone
The pictures of your face are still here
In my head, my heart and in the street
Walking in the snow while half asleep
Every step I take is another one I miss
I can't even look at the homeless
I'm trapped in a nightmare where love is emptiness
I take a lukewarm coffee in the cheapest place
In all the people around me I see your face
The politics around us may prepare the next world war
Even with a gun in my hand I'll still look at the stars
I know this is a bit unhealthy
But I can't take you ignoring me
If only I could rewind the time
There's a million things I'd do differently
I may be feeling no pain
But there's fake blood in my veins
I saw myself kissing you in a field
On the first of july of 2018
It may be irrational but it kept me sane
You don't know how hard your heart is to obtain
You know for you I'd change
I'd change.
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10. |
Thirst (new year's eve)
05:29
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I get used to the sound of the blood
When all that remains is a rod
And it falls on the floor like the rain
And the only feeling left is pain
I opened the scars wide with a knife
Always wanting more out of life
And my lifeless glass eyes remain
Because the only feeling left is pain
Can youuuu ... get this ?
Can youuuu ... get this?
And in the night, you hear me talk
I talk to myself when I'm cold
Sorry I think we have to walk
I think we have to walk
Having sex gives me no pleasure
I just feel disgusting when we're together
The feeling gets fainter and fainter
And time is getting longer and longer
Crushing our bodies feels so vain
Because the only feeling left is pain
Searching for pain is becoming an addiction
And pain remains as my last emotion
Can youuuu ... get this ?
Can youuuu ... get this?
Can youuuu ... get this ?
Can youuuu ... get this?
(I know it may sound weird
I know you won't resist
Maybe it's time to die
Maybe it's time to die)
(send off)
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11. |
16
03:57
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These children
Are playing
Even if it's frozen
The small pains
The torture
When snow turns into rain
Blank smiles
It's over
Blank smiles
It's over
Smile until it's over
Smile until it's over
Your eyes look
So empty
Lifeless conversations
And they took
All of me
Except my emotions
Blank smiles
It's over
Blank smiles
It's over
Smile until it's over
Smile until it's over
Smile until it's over
Smile until it's over
Keep the dream alive
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Feldup France
I want to make music.
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